


the stars that reflect in his glass eyes

by love_lave



Category: The Song of Achilles - Madeline Miller
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Road Trip, M/M, Multi, Well - Freeform, achilles is an actual diva, artist Patroclus, because this is important to me, my own summer vaca is almost over so im gonna make them have a hella nice one, patrochilles - Freeform, penelope is really only mentioned in this, road trip is mentioned many times but hasn't actually happened yet, so i wont put her up as a character in it, that might be a fic later, this fic is more the pre road trip, who got most of his drama from eighteenth century gothic novels and you can't tell me otherwise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-28
Updated: 2019-07-28
Packaged: 2020-07-23 12:31:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20008342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/love_lave/pseuds/love_lave
Summary: The bed itself is layered with blanket after blanket and pillows are strewn everywhere. I lay amongst them hoping to be allowed to join their little cloud community. I squeeze one close to my chest, stuffing my face into it.It still smells like him.Figs and oranges we eat for breakfast and bath bombs that Briseis has coaxed him into.Even a hint of oil paints he promised himself to use at least once a day.It’s intoxicating.|||





	the stars that reflect in his glass eyes

**Author's Note:**

> i turned on lofi beats, made coffee, then lit a mango candle at 11 at night and this idea from months ago stomped it's way back in -- it took about three days to write this so i hope that it isn't too messy ;; but i am super proud of this one and i hope you guys all like it as well 
> 
> also you can't tell me achilles entire dramatic brain isn't just an expectation vs. reality meme - and that that boy didn't get read dramatic fairytale after dramatic fairytale and didn't base himself off of those - he now gets his drama from gothic literature
> 
> okay psa over, i hope you enjoy reading ahdlfhsadfhd

His eyes catch mine through circle rimmed glasses and I suddenly remember the purpose for every decision I have made up till now. It feels like second nature to pull him to me and kiss him until we’re both blind. He smiles against me and I’m smiling too, making this goodbye last as long as I physically can. I can tell he doesn’t want to leave either as the hands he has gripping into my shirt grow stronger. All I can do is kiss him harder and hold on even tighter. I want to whisper and say so many things to him that I didn’t get to earlier that morning. I feel as if I’m running out of time, that time cut all too short when a voice yells to disturb our peace. 

“Okay you lovebirds, we get it! Now Patroclus get a move on before this train leaves without us!” The beautiful boy in question pulls away from me, much to my disarray. His doe eyes flutter open and it feels as if I’m falling in love all over again. He gives me an apologetic smile. 

“I probably should be getting going, Briseis would never let me go of it if I’m late.” I pout and he reaches up to kiss me one more time, a shorter more chaste one. Or at least I believe that’s what he had intended. 

_Neither of us can ever let go_. 

It isn’t until Odysseus tugs on the back of Patroclus’ oversized denim jacket that we finally pull part again. We get a few more second lived kisses in before Odysseus has completely tugged him away from me. My body automatically reaches out for him but as soon as I try arms are wrapped around my middle from behind, keeping me and my white converses grounded in my spot as my love is dragged off. I feel saddened as he smiles at me and says an ‘I love you’, Odysseus still pulling on his arm, making him trip over his own vans, both of them laughing at the fact. Of course I yell ‘I love you too’ back, not caring about what the other people standing on the train platform think, waving as they disappear onto the train car. I just feel like crying now. 

“Dude he’s just going to downtown for the afternoon, _not war -_ He’ll be back this evening, damn.” Diomedes says as he finally lets go of me, giving me that ‘calm the hell down’ look that all our friends give us. Well, mostly give me. 

_Okay, so maybe I’m a tad bit dramatic._

Patroclus doesn’t seem to mind it and I don’t care as much about everyone else’s thoughts so I ignore them for the most part. 

“Ugh, I miss him already.” I hug myself as we walk off the platform to the busy street behind it, cars whipping by and the sun beating down on us. I don’t mind the heat as it shows summer is finally upon us, reminding me of how close I am to finally seeing the ocean again. 

“Yeah, well, as he and Dis are going to watch Briseis’s fashion show we,” he finger guns to me,” have our last final to take and then the true freedom begins.” I let out an actual sound of disgust at the reminder I have a huge final to take in my Eighteenth Century Novels class. As much as I love literature and am glad that it’ll be what I’m doing for the rest of my life, this final was the last thing I was looking forward to. _Also, yes, I am an english major_ . I allow myself to zone out the rest of the world as Diomedes and I make our way back to the campus. I daydream of the ocean, the warm sand, _him of course_. 

How he’ll be painting with his travel set of watercolors on the beach before I’m pulling him off to go mess around under the summer sun. 

How he’ll try to stay up till three a.m. every night saying he needs to finish commissions before I’m dragging him under our bed covers.

I already knew that he would make us take a stop at every major destination we came to so he could do a quick sketch of it like the artist he was. I wasn’t sure how he was going to do on our summer vacation road trip not being able to touch his paints at least once a day as Odysseus had already appointed him as the ‘head of telling directions officer since you and Achilles are the only two who can actually pronounce things and I’m driving so’. Odysseus had gotten a hit from Briseis for that. This “Summer Vaca” as Diomedes was calling it, was originally just small dumb talk we had one night when Odysseus had decided to sneak alcohol into the dorm rooms and then suddenly the two, being Diomedes and Odysseus, were checking mileages on rental cars and how much was too much on a hotel, constantly repeating that we must end our sophmore year and start our junior one with a bang. They talked me into it the second they mentioned staying at the beach for a few days and slowly, but reassuringly I also managed to get Patroclus and Briseis on board with it as well. Then it was official. We were to be traveling across america for the summer, or at least most of it in a _fucking classic volkswagen minibus that looked like it had been rusting since the 60s._ Upon seeing the picture Patroclus had given an eye roll harsh enough to kill then asked if we were secretly also going monster hunting as the Scooby Doo gang; to which Briseis laughed so hard she accidentally snorted her starbucks coffee up her nose and then spent the next two hours deciding who was who. Odysseus had immediately called Patroclus on Velma as he was in the mist of pushing up his glasses and whilst he sassed back, I took great pride in the fact that I was the clear Daphne of the group. Diomedes practically called dibs on Scoobert as Briseis and Odysseus argued over which of them was the true Fred Jones. 

“-Goodluck on your test my dude.” Diomedes voice cuts in through my thoughts, making me realize how long I hadn’t been paying attention to our surroundings. We reached the main campus building, Diomedes and I splitting paths to head to our detromenting faiths. I give a quick ‘good luck’ to the taller guy who was already walking off. Luckily my exam room is only a five minute walk, _less for me cause best sprinter on the track team not to brag_ and finding a seat was easy with the extra twenty minutes to spare. I spend that twenty minutes browsing Instagram and talking to Patrocus, seeing the photos that he’s posted of the sketches he’s done of Briseis’ outfits. I fell bad for missing it, but I know the way to Briseis’ heart, it’s nothing a quick cafe cookie can’t fix. 

/// 

After doing an exam for almost two hours, waiting another hour under a campus tree for Diomedes to finish his computer coding one, and then spend nearly three hours eating lunch to argue over _if we could make Jiffy pop in the mystery van using a lighter_

his words not mine,

in the grocery store. Finally I am home, heavy bags on my arms as I feel like collapsing in the doorway, but I make it to my boyfriend’s and I shared bed before doing that. Our apartment is small, but cozy and even though we’ve been moving in slowly since we got it two months before the school year ended, unopened boxes still litter the floor. Most of them are written on in my very pretty, but I will admit unintelligible hand writing. The side of our bed is against a large window that has a sill, a place that mostly is being used to hold a stuffed bear, occasional drinks, and a small drawing area. It’s homey. Also allowing in all the sunlight we could ever ask for, making mornings just a tad bit better for the both of us. The bed itself is layered with blanket after blanket and pillows are strewn everywhere. I lay amongst them hoping to be allowed to join their little cloud community. I squeeze one close to my chest, stuffing my face into it. 

_It still smells like him._

_Figs and oranges we eat for breakfast and bath bombs that Briseis has coaxed him into._

_Even a hint of oil paints he promised himself to use at least once a day._

_It’s intoxicating._

The afternoon sun is filtering through the windows and my senses are being attacked with anything and everything that is Patroclus. My thoughts become just a little further and my eyes stay closed for just a little longer and before I can truly stop myself I’m drifting off. 

I don’t know how long I was asleep for but the sun is just a little lower in the sky and my phone is going ballistic. 

I mumble under my breath and then reach to the right of the bed where my phone lays on the small nightstand. I stretch and miss a few times before finally grabbing it and looking at my stack notifications that cover a picture of Patroclus sleeping on me. He still gets red in the face when he sees it so I’ve only kept the photo as my lock screen for even longer. A few messages are from the boy in question, some from Odysseus sending me links to weird articles, and about 20 from Diomedes that he sent to our group chat with links to random vines or dumb things he found on Twitter. I look at the time and realize I’m only an hour from seeing my boy instead of three and all my energy seems to return at once. I sit up quickly and send a quick text to Diomedes who makes an immediate response to meet at the train platform in ten. 

_I can feel the mess my hair is without even having to see it._

I have Diomedes stop at the closest cafe for my apology cookie as I brush my hair a million times over. I even put braids into the sides and pull it back into the ponytail since if I act like I have time, I feel as if I actually have time and eh, why the hell not. I’m expecting nothing but hugs and kisses for the rest of the night so I must be prepared. With a quick brush of my teeth and the grab of essentials, I met up with Diomedes and make the walk to the train stop. Luckily, it’s not nearly as crowded as it was that morning. It’s seven in the evening and the sun hasn’t exactly started setting yet, but half of the sky is a darker shade of blue than the rest. It makes a beautiful gradient to stare at so I can pass the waiting minutes that tick by. As soon as I see the elevated train car in the distance I feel my heart jump in my throat. I know that I’m going to act “over=dramatic”, but with the feeling of not seeing him for most of the day weighing on my chest, I make the defense that I can be as dramatic as I want. _I’m going through Patroclus withdraws, okay._

When he steps off the car, his eyes are just as big and his smile just as sweet. I’m quick to have him in my arms and as soon as I do, I feel complete once again. End of story, there is no need for any more chapters with everything that can be perfect is.

Odysseus and Briseis are there too I guess. Diomedes as well. Yeah, I can see why they do call me dramatic. 

Odysseus and Diomedes give a quick peck and I keep forgetting that them and Penelope are together. Their relationship is the utter opposite of what Patroclus and I have. Whilst we’re touchy constantly, they’ll hold pinkies down the street. Penelope also goes to another university so I could feel for them, happy that they’ll be able to see her when we met half way on our “oh so amazing summer vaca that’s not going to have any problems whatsoever” as Diomedes has told her. Or as Odysseus has described it “I’m so fucking tired I hopefully don’t pass out behind the wheel but I need a break damnit”. I can only hope of the best for this summer. As I kiss the brunet’s temple I faintly hear Diomedes ask Briseis how the show went. The girl squeals and then starts rambling on about the different outfits and how the models were amazing. Patroclus and I finally let go of each other at her ten minute mark and I interrupt to give her my apology cookie that I get another squeal for and a hug whilst my boyfriend pouts at me for not getting him a sweet as well. I kiss the pout away until it turns into fits of laughter. It’s then that we finally take our leave off the train platform. Our hands intertwine easily as if they were carved for that exact and only purpose. 

_His hand is slightly smaller than mine but not too greatly. It fits perfect and is a warm weight keeping us connected._

The five of us argue over what dinner we should get like any and all people that have went to get food together. Diomedes suggest pizza, Briseis says she can’t do that four nights in a row, frozen or not. Odysseus suggests a fancy sit down restaurant, Patroclus comments ‘I thought you actually wanted money for this trip’. Diomedes then suggests to just heat up ramen and I have to decline. It’s practically all I ate for a month even with a nagging Patroclus who was going by the same horrible eating habits, now I can’t look at ramen every the same way. We just end up going to a diner where I eat too many overly salted fries and wish to cry for the next few hours. 

/// 

By the time Patroclus and I finally get to relax after having to finish packing and trying to save panicking that we forgot something for the next morning, the sun has already set and the moon lights the streets. We lay next to each other on the bed I had taken a three hour cat nap on earlier, the pillows and blankets somehow feeling even softer now that he was here. On our backs we look out the large window we got the marvelous chance of having, our hands holding in the small space between us. This wasn’t the first time we had decided to stare at the night sky, this almost becoming a tradition of ours since we had met as teenagers. The first time was on the roof of my house. The second in the middle of a field on the roof of his dad’s car he allowed him to drive. The third was when we were juniors and a senior we knew was graduating. Someone had snuck alcohol into the graduation party and even though we barely touched any, we still acted loopy like the dumb teens we were. We had just decided to lay in the middle of the empty driveway, not even caring that the kids parents car could possibly show up and end our lives as we knew it. No, we were too busy kissing. My first touch of heaven, our first step into this amazing relationship that we weren’t going to be letting go of any time soon, was in some kid’s driveway that we can’t even remember the name of anymore. I’ve always admitted that I usually spend more time staring at Patroclus than I do the stars. Like now. 

“I still have no idea how to find the big dipper.” He shakes his head. I laugh and say

“Neither can I.” 

“Can’t find any of the constellations either.”

“Quite the mystery.” 

_I want him to look at me._

_It’s like a sudden rush through my body, feeling as if my heart is exploding under his grip._

“You know how many nights I’ve spent trying to research and just not getting it.” He laughs, pushing our shoulders together.

_So close yet so far I think to myself._

_So many words._

_My mind goes through every book I’ve ever read trying to just find the perfect ones._

“Sometimes I wonder if the stars were just put here for our entertainment. Like some god decided to hang them in the sky just so we could have something to look at.” He sounds so soft and looks so lost. 

_I have too many feelings blooming in my chest and I don’t know where to put them._

_I can see the fairy lights around our room being reflected in his glasses._

_They light up his skin perfectly._

“Silly midnight thoughts really.”

“Say more. Please?” I choke on the words even if they sounded smooth to his ears. Amusement takes over his face. 

“Well, what if, a god of some sort of creation, took sympathy on all those who were lonely, and gave them stars so they wouldn’t be anymore.” He’s biting his smile. I already know he’ll be drawing it later. 

_It hurts when our eyes aren’t connected._

_My soul aches when he’s not there to fill it’s perfectly sized him shape hole._

_I just, just want him to look my way so I can say so many things._

“As I said, silly midnight rambles, but,,, if it were to be true, I suppose I really wouldn’t have a need for stars then anymore.” 

_There he is._

_There I am._

_And there they are._

_I can see stars in his eyes, some reflected in his glasses, most all made himself in his iris._

Our noses are touching and he’s smiling so sweetly. It scares me what the next few days are going to be like with how perfect this moment is now. It’s almost too perfect; but he decided to close the gap between us and I can’t ever think when he’s kissing me. I try to make full coherent thoughts, but they all fall to pieces when he tilts his head a certain way and has my face in his hands. I draw invisible lines that connect his freckles I have already long memorized. 

“I love you,,” The phrase tumbles out of me before I even realize I said it. It’s not anything new, nothing surprising. Of all the words that fly through my head, those are the only ones I could seem to remember how to say. His name as well, of course. He plays with the end of my hair as he says words I worship almost as much as I worship him. 

“I love you too, though I’m sure that was already obvious.” He’s whispering and I feel as if we’re kids staying up past our bed time, trying to spend every second we can together before someone tells us we have to separate. I don’t like the thought of separating and I don’t like the distance between us so I kiss him again. 

_And again._

_And again._

_And again._

_I kiss him to the point I’m not sure either of us are breathing._

_And I’m okay with that._

_I just hope he is too._

**Author's Note:**

> just to let you know i listened to a mix of lofi beats for the first half and then the last half was mostly in love with a ghost whose music is so damn beautiful ;; during the constellation part i just had in love with a ghost - lets go (full ep) playing on repeat and words were actually happening for me ?? anywho, i hope you guys liked this longer than expected story, with only like a month left of summer vacation im trying to live it as much as possible which brings the suggestion ,,, whilst writing this i thought up some ideas for maybe a multi chapter fic ?? i.e. literally just writing the road trip mentioned many a times - i just lose motivation easily and it's usually hard for me to write many chapters, but if some are interested in seeing it i will try my best damnit ;; just let me knnnoowww ~ might as well make something of this summer i did mostly nothing in 
> 
> i apologize for how long these notes are, but thank you for reading !! and comments and criticism are always, always appreciated so please do leave one if you wish ~~ thank you again lovelies and have an amazing day ~~


End file.
